To Be Someone
by Lady of Snow
Summary: Short story about a few of the nobodies of Organization XIII, their others, the differences between, and what remians the same.


Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts and won't be making anything from this story.

To Be Someone

Kairi has never been very good at drawing. Her little doodle of Sora in the Secret Place is the closest likeness to a person she's ever gotten. Really it's the hair that distinguishes it, that's how people can tell its Sora.

So it surprises no one when Naminé's drawing isn't much better.

This frustrates Naminé to no end. She's the witch who manipulates memories with drawings. Badly drawn drawings. Not that being a witch is a good thing, she thinks, but if that's what you're known for you should at least be _good at it._

She takes to practicing when she's not retelling people's lives. Sketches are everywhere – of people she might have once known, the Organization, what she wishes would happen, what would be nice if it happened, and what will never happen. Sadly, her drawings of Axel and Roxas together (and happy at the same time) fall into the last category.

In rare moods, usually after trying days with Marluxia, Naminé draws what she thinks deserves to happen. When's she's done she always sees Sora, Riku, and Kairi staring back at her – _always smiling, always happy, always together._

As she tucks these drawings away she wonders if this is like betraying yourself.

* * *

Lumaria had always had a passion for flowers. Growing up his greatest ambition was to own his own flower shop. Where he'd be able to tell every customer the meaning behind the flower they had picked out.

When he wasn't learning how to raise them or their meanings he experimented. Cross-pollination and hybrids had always fascinated him.

Marluxia still favored flowers, although they had a more sinister feel these days. Instead of thinking of the life he was taking care of he thought of the life he could potentially take away with his vines.

He still experiments though for different reasons. Other members of the Organization will find them all over the castle – his own room too full of flowers already. Of all the plants he's toyed with Marluxia has never tried to raise lilacs. The smell, he would say when asked (which was rare), bothered his nose.

Every Spring Lumaria would be asked why he was ignoring his various on-going experiments. He'd grin at them and say 'I'm raising lilacs now; they're my mother's favorite.' His mother's birthday was in May.

* * *

The first book Ienzo ever read that sparked his love for science was Organic Chemistry II as a Second Language. Since he felt as if he owed something to that particular book he kept the aging copy with him until the day that he died.

Zexion is looking for a book on some equations he wants to try when he comes across the most ridiculous book in the entire library. 'Organic Chemistry II as a Second Language' he scoffs. While the worn copy is not ridiculous on its own, it is compared to the high caliber of the other books housed in the library. Its weird placement is to be noted as well: nestled between a book on Quantum Physics and some book on a religion.

His thoughts as he leaves are on the categorization of the library and what fool had done it. Certainly not some _out-dated_ book that did not tug at his non-existent heart strings.

So why is it that days later the beat up book in question is now hidden behind rows of books on magic?

Lea liked to brag about a lot of things. That was just the way he was. The one thing he thought he was justified in bragging about would that he was the greatest friend in the _whole wide world._ All of his friends would in fact agree.

It wasn't really major things he did – things that would be considered 'buying' a friendship were just things he didn't do. If you forgot your lunch he'd share his with you. That new zombie flick you both wanted to see, he bought it, so why don't you have a sleep over so you can watch it together. Things like this that made him stand out to his friends. I suppose though that these things would be major to the right people.

Axel thought he was still a great best friend. Then why was he staring at Roxas' back as _he walked away from Axel?_ This was going so, so wrong according to the great friendship handbook (that Axel may have well written). Whispering 'I'd miss you' wasn't nearly as dramatic if the best friend didn't hear and _didn't come back._

Nobodies aren't supposed to feel hurt but that's what he'd label it (kind of like he was a blown apart from the inside out starting where a heart should be) when he thinks maybe Lea could've gotten Roxas to stay.

When Axel is lying in front of Sora, (dying again,_ how funny_) he thinks Lea would have been proud. Sacrificing yourself for your friend and all that.

* * *

Myde had always been deathly afraid of the water. Tiptoed around it as his siblings splashed into it. Bath time was merely tolerated. Having such distaste for it he never bothered to learn how to swim.

How ironic then that a heartless dragged him underwater to his death. So he drowned, or lost his heart, or something, he didn't like to remember the particulars of how exactly he became _nobody._

What's more ironic, or perhaps it's a cruel twist of fate, is that he wakes up as Demyx the Melodious Nocturne. Who can control water.

Water, he would think, of all elements was never meant to be controlled. The rushing currents, fierce waterfalls and whirlpools, seemingly bottomless oceans – all of that would give Myde nightmares.

Demyx watches as the water dances around him – taking down his foes one by one. Sometimes the water dancers bash into each other, sending water crashing everywhere. He is no longer afraid of the water, because really, _what else_ could it take from him?

* * *

It would have been nice if The World That Never Was and Organization XIII had been just a nightmare. Well, except for Axel, Roxas had always liked him. A nightmare filled with coldness and dread that no one should ever experience.

Instead Roxas is standing in front of monitors, smashing them until they can never be used again. The good dream is Twilight Town, The Disciplinary Committee, struggling with Hayner, working on homework they'd put off with Pence, Olette dragging him shopping, _all that laughter._ All of it – nothing more than a passing dream.

His reality is Sora – becoming one with Sora – and being Roxas no more. Sora can't be complete without him and Roxas didn't really have a choice in the matter anyway.

When he fought Riku in The World That Never Was his mind was screaming 'look at me!' Which is weird to want to scream at someone who is blindfolded, who could possibly _be blind_ – but Roxas knew Riku's eyes like he knew his keyblades.

No, he wanted Riku to see him as Roxas not as _Sora's other._ In certain circumstances it might be comforting to know how far Riku is willing to go for Sora (who he will eventually be) but now he just wants Riku to _see him._

When they're back on Destiny Islands after their last adventure Riku and Sora will head out to the play island to spar. When Riku wins he says 'See, you'll never beat me!' ('_Got it memorized?')_Sometimes Sora swears he hears things that aren't really said. Like right now he's looking at Riku out the corner of his eye and his mind is screaming 'look at me!' Which is insane, they're best friends, Riku's always paying attention to him – but then Sora's not so sure he's the one screaming.

* * *

Every single member of the Organization wants a heart. This is great in theory – until they start wondering who they would be. There are subtle differences from their others. The most obvious is how cruel they can be in their new lives (Lumaria would never create plants to hurt people, Myde would never have fought Sora unless of course he was throwing water at him, backstabbing and traitor weren't words that Lea knew) – hopefully though that wasn't the only difference.

With hearts they had been _somebody_ and without _nobody._ If they gained hearts, they all think at one point or another, will I still be me or will I be _them again?_

Author's Note: I woke up one morning and couldn't get back to sleep until I wrote out this idea I had – and this whole thing was written. I really liked writing Naminé's part and Demyx's. So please review if you have time: if you liked it, or questions/concerns.


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